Rachael's Page

It all starts basically the same... I was raised in a christian home. I fall in the middle of 2 sisters which can be a blessing and yet a curse all in one. Growing up I was a daddy's little girl. He and I were always doing things together; fishing, baseball, soccer, cars, football, rookie card collecting... basically anything you can imagine! My mom was like my best friend. I knew that I could go to her with anything. Things began to change noticably when I was around 10 years old. Thats when my sisters and I began to notice my parents drifting apart, fighting, and going weeks without speaking, and my dad and I never spoke. At the begining of my 7th grade we moved to Rockford, MI. I got to make so many new friends and because of being home-schooled and then attending private school up until then, it was a crazy new experience for me. In 8th grade I was heavly depressed and always dealing with rejection and seeking attention from others. Once freshman year hit things were just getting worse and worse by the day. My sisters and I were constantly fighting and in rebellion. In 2003, the end of my sophmore year, my parents were at their end. That was the year my dad moved out and things went way down hill for me. My older sister and I started hanging out and getting close. She and some of my friends introduced me to alcohol and marijuana, and I began to use on a regular basis. I fell into deception so bad that the lies I would tell my mom and friends became reality to me. I also began to steal, not caring from who or where, if I wanted it....I took it. Once junior year hit I could barely 2 days without smoking weed or snorting aderal. I started hanging out with different people and venturing out of my 'bubble'. In my senior year, I was basically constantly high. I would go to school high and need to be high to function. Some how I still managed to graduate high school and be accepted into a private college. So straight out of high school I moved onto campus and continued to party.... just now a little harder. I skipped school so much and because of that I failed like all my credits and got kicked out at semester mark. So I started just partying all the time with no priorities anywhere in life and not caring about anyone besides myself. This whole time I still vowed to remain a virgin until I got married. Basically though I was still only a a-y virgin (so technically now I realize I wasn't one at all). I went through the guys, loving the attention and playing with thier hearts, the whole while trying to figure out where I was going in life. In 2006 I met a guy and almost instantly fell in love with him. Within a month we were fornicating and I was pretty much living with him and his family. I had a promise ring and we justified everything by saying that we were gonna be together forever and get married. Even for a worldy relationship, it was totally unhealthy. I was so broken and at the end of my rope in January 2007. After spending my birthday in November and Christmas basically alone the year before I realized I had pushed my family, myself and more importantly God out of my life. I was so depressed, felt so rejected and so hopeless that I wanted to run far away forever, from everything. Then to top it all off my sister and her boyfriend were planning on moving to Arizona in March. Wow, I felt I had no one and nothing to live for. I went to visit them in April for her birthday and on Friday 4/20/2007 I rededicated my life to Christ. The following Tuesday I went back to MI to do what I had to do. I sat down with my boyfriend and told him flat out 'we're not gonna have sex anymore, were not gonna do this this and this and things are gonna have to totally change.' And he had the courage to tell me no. So I broke up with him that Tuesday and by the next Thursday I too moved down to AZ!! Hmmm.... you thought I was gonna say it all got easy from there.... WRONG!!! Actually just the opposite, things got harder. Soul ties were brought up, broken relationships needed healing, my pride needed killing and I needed forgiving. Its almost been a year now and praise God that I am still here and living for Christ. The enemy has tried taking me out many times in many ways... but IN JESUS NAME he will flee!!! God has been doing surgery on my heart, and my mind. I am fallin in love all over again with Him each day. I will not let the devil lie to me!! I refuse to be pushed around by him!!! I AM A SOLIDER!!! AN OVERCOMER!!!! A WARRIOR!!!! A PRINCESS OF THE MOST HIGH!!!!! JESUS CHRIST IS MY LIFE!!!!!!